Panic Redux

Yesterday I had a panic attack.  It was a really bad one.  I thought that I was having a heart attack and that I was going to die.  What made the whole situation worse is that I was watching my eight year old nephew. I woke up yesterday and felt a passing pain in my chest.  I sat up and I immediately felt light headed.  It was more than that.  I felt as if I wasn’t fully in my body.  I felt as if I was about to leave it.  My heart started racing.  I tried to calm myself done. … Continue reading Panic Redux

Sick and Tired of Being Utterly Disgusted

Yesterday, I got sick of living in a filthy room.  There was a pile of dirty clothes puddled right outside the bathroom door.  There was cat puke on the rug and empty water bottles everywhere and random papers on the floor.  There was also a lot of roaches.  I live in a finished basement.  We have roaches and the summer heat has only made that situation worse.  They seem to be attracted to the area where I keep Nella’s food and water.  I’ve been disgusted to actually see a bunch of roaches congregating around Nella’s water bowl as if they … Continue reading Sick and Tired of Being Utterly Disgusted

My Mother and I

Me:  We have a bottle of champagne that we haven’t drunk yet My mother: Karen, I want you to stop drinking. Me:  That’s not going to happen My mother: Karen, you scare me. You know you are not just messing with your life. You’re messing with my life. Me: I don’t get drunk, Mother My mother:  Karen, you get heavily drunk.  You know that your life is not just about you? Let me stop this conversation right here.  I’m not a drinker.  I’ve been on antidepressants for the last 7 years so I don’t imbibe a great deal of alcohol. … Continue reading My Mother and I