I don’t have a goal weight. The scale and I have never been friends. She is a nasty bitch who likes to steal my joy. The happiest that I have ever been was when I was working out 5 days a week and not weighing myself at all. The above pictures are from that time period. My awesome trainer, Rachel, used to take pictures to document my progress. This was important because she wasn’t letting me weigh myself because I was strength training. I felt so good during this period. Of course, I was sore all the time because of the amount of weight that I was lifting, but I was taking stairs like they were nothing. I was super flexible and had incredible stamina. I was also crazy strong. I could leg press 335 lbs. And that was with me weighing over 300 lbs. I did squats with ease. I was doing push-ups on a weight bar. I could chest press with 25 lb dumbbells in each hand. I was doing 80 lbs on the Lat Pull down and the Seated Row. I was also a beast on the cardio. I used to do a circuit. I would do 15 minutes on the treadmill, 15 mins on the elliptical, 15 mins on the bike and then another 15 minutes on the treadmill. I was super awesome. My clothes fit looser and although I didn’t drop several drop sizes, I had dropped at least one. Better than that, my mood was so light that my therapist and I were talking about reducing my medication. Exercise releases endorphin. This is what I want to get back to. This is my goal. I want my strength back. I want my stamina, flexibility and endurance back. I want it all back. So I don’t have a goal weight, but I do have goal state of fitness. Now, I know that I will never be skinny, but I can be fit.