I have to break up with my sister.

My sister has managed to convince me to put her needs and those of her family before my own for the past two years while simultaneously trying to shame me for not making my life completely about her and what she needs.  I have slowly but surely started to HATE her for it.  It became so clear while her asshole husband was shouting at me.  They are trying to use me and they are angry because I won’t allow it.  They are trying to make me feel guilty for putting myself first while trying to justify their own need to put themselves first.  So we would all be putting them first.  Who does that work out for?  You know I have felt so guilty for the last two years because I haven’t devoted my life to taking care of Trisha and her family’s needs.  Why would I do that?  This is my life. They have been nothing but ungrateful and now they are downright abusive.  Asshole accused me of wanting Trisha to be my maid.  THEY WOULD HAVE ME BE THEIR SLAVE!!  It’s more than ok for me to put my needs first.  It’s my life not theirs.  I have no children and no husband.  My life is mine.  I’m supposed to devote all my life to them because Trisha used to cook for her family and let me eat as well?  I have paid for that 100 times over in dishes that were never cleaned fast enough, or well enough.  They dump their children on me again and again and are now trying to convince me that I should be thankful for the privilege.  They deny me any and all requests and have the nerve to speak to me about family and doing for each other.  Family doesn’t use each other.  I have been used.  Those people are toxic and I must cut them off to save myself.  I feel like I’ve been attacked and I have, but I will do my damnedest to make sure it doesn’t happen again.

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